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Back in!

Hello again! So sorry!

Can't quite honestly believe the 'faff' involved in getting back into my blog! Wix was absolutely no help at all, even though I could 100 % prove that I am the sole owner of the website and it's domain, the computer said NO! Eeeeeee Couldn't make it up! Anyway, I finally realised I'd used my google account to set it all up and hey presto I'm back. Gotta be honest, I was a little 'frustflippingstrated' and then oddly, I couldn't care less.

Life went on apace, wether I could blog or not.

Nobody complained, no one died. It's all good.

My time off has been about hospital appointments and waiting as patiently as I can manage. I've had some health issues yet to be fully diagnosed, but suffice to say, my summer plans are on hold. Again, really frustrating, but it's an unavoidable 'wait and see' situation I cannot beat.

My experience of the NHS so far has been sad really. I can tell every single department is brutally overwhelmed post COVID. They are doing their best. My two week wait to get a diagnosis will be more like 6 in the end. It is what it is! Of course I will chat in more depth soon, but for now I really don't see the point, as until I know for sure if its something, it's ABSOLUTELY nothing.

Obviously, I'm a little fed up, more because the youngest is home from Uni and I'd promised her some fabulous European adventures. I think she's as fed up as I am, bless her. I feel this summer will be her last at home, next year she will be off on her travels with her friends and we will barely see her pretty face. Time goes way too fast doesn't it? Anyway, I've been concentrating on setting myself little daily challenges to keep my mind busy. I don't like to wallow, but I do have a tendency to think the worst and do exactly that, wallow like a depressed pig in a very deep mud bath! 'Stuck in the Mud' I call it! I'm not ashamed to report that I'm more than a bit terrified, trying to be both brave and strong, happily putting peopling on hold because I have to deal with ME first. I keep reminding myself that there are many people out there with worse problems than mine and that's a fact.

Last night the lovely waitresses serving us were from Ukraine. Beautiful, smiling people and yet they've lost everything. Everything. They are showing us that we can restart from scratch! It's not easy but sometimes necessary. I agree. I feel, I've always felt, that I can press the restart button on everything I've ever done as many times as I like. Trying is not the failure. Failing to try, is.

During my blogging hiatus, I decided to also cut back on my online community responsibilities. Stress is a killer isn't it? Sometimes we have to make the decision to just look after self. I've made the sad but necessary decision to pull the plug on Simply. It's a relief. I have absolutely no wish to flog my guts out managing other people right now. I've done my bit over the last decade or so and I've pretty much run out of steam. It's a good decision for me. Life goes on. I just don't need the stress.

I'm not sad, but I am rather understandably distracted by my health woes and of course I'm on a new and improved health kick, trying to improve my physical health as well as my mental and emotional health. I'm suddenly finding that I'm picking my battles and not stressing about things I can't hope to change. There will be a lot of delays going forward, somethings longed for may never happen, thats okay and I have to learn to deal with both the frustration and disappointment better, I know. Life has thrown me quite a curveball and simply put, I've no choice but to keep calm and carry on. I've also realised that I can still make tentative plans, but expect those plans to be rather more fluid. I'm a work in progress, always learning.

The Wreck project has stalled until he can get over to onboard new workers. We were at the stage where we really needed the carpenter to get going. If you've followed this blog, you'll know I wasn't keen on the guy supposed to be doing the carpentry from the get go. The signs he would be trouble were there from the start. Anyway, He hasn't even bothered to finish the one window he did do! He has messed us around a lot with dates to come back and then decided to take a better gig. Utter time waster! I was not surprised and there have been a few along the way.

What has surprised me is the sheer cheek of the guy! He's just been intouch to complain about me saying he's unreliable! He is and I'm standing by it. It's so simple really! Do the job you were paid for to a good and finished standard. Don't constantly say you are coming to start work then offer yet another excuse as to why not! You don't have to to take the work, but if you do then be professional and reliable! Our project can't wait for you to pick and choose!

Anyway, we need to get a new carpenter on board ASAP, have more plastering done and then the finishing can start. We really expected to be almost ready for photographs by the end of this month! Alas, like many projects in life, we've fallen behind despite our best efforts! Another three months should see the house ready ish for the market, but maybe we should just aim for Christmas and be done with it at this rate, eh! There's been such a lot achieved but progress has been much slower than we wished for. Again, we are learning many valuable lessons and as he's determined to live in and renovate next time, this project definitely helps us understand the realities!

In other news, the big kids have gone aboard for a wedding and their dog has been struggling a bit. He suffers with terrible separation anxiety and its literally been shit and pee for days. Him in Doors is not happy! I totally understand his point of view, but even I found it funny when Ralph cocked his legs on 'his madges' newly ironed shirts, hung on the dining chair! Oops! They've had a really good long walk today (the dog and the hubby) and so I hope our grandpup is a bit more settled? All we can be is patient with him and lets face it, we are all a little bit broken aren't we?

Oh and I've also been TV bonding with the youngest by watching Love Island with her! What a load of old tosh but I'm hooked! I cannot not believe how boring the program is, how much bottom flesh is on show and how the girls and boys prostitute themselves in the pursuit of love......who am I kidding? It's all for fame! Good luck to them! I find Davide lacking in everything other than a fab body and Fecking Su a total game player! Also, I really want to know when they get to eat properly and they do anything meaningful during the day? Do they go dancing at night? Eeeee the days in the house of lust must be long eh! They should do the same program for over 50's would be hilarious! Can you imagine the HRT and viagra fuelled antics! Be nice though, as I'm sure they would have some real life experiences to talk about! Also, I note sadly that the program lacks body diversity and positivity! Be nice to see cellulite and a muffin top eh! Shame!

It's a super shallow game show and I love it!

Be good!


D x

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