Day 9

.......in the January 2023 Holland Palace!

How dare you suggest that I'm just out of my PJ's at 11 am, or that I breakfasted like a Queen during the January drought of food and fun and of course, I'm not watching re runs of Desperate Housewives!

Really!

January blues? What January blues?

Okay maybe a little bit and I think I know why!

It's Harry and Meghan's issues! They are really getting to me, so help me god.

Of course they aren't, but it's January and I have nothing much to think about and like many DIL's, I recognise the weird family dynamics, which aren't as unusual as you'd like to think. The wives and husbands of said son's and or daughter's aren't always what the family ordered sadly. Tut, tut!

Women need to have voices. Women do not need to be weak or be invisible. Women can generally sort their own shit out and the Royal family are remiss in trying to get their women to fade into insignificance.

Inherited titles don't make anyone better than anyone else, unless the entitled really reach down to pick the rest of us up and lead by good example.

That said, families are very complicated aren't they? I can sympathise with Harry in some parts of his book and I know why he wrote it, it's his story to tell, not the media's. He'd hit the end of the road where his family and the media are concerned, sure. He could have gone to ground and protected those in house secrets but why should he?

Thats called taking back control from a very negative narrative and filling the family coffers in the process. We all have to earn if not paid by the public purse. Let's normalise that at least? He was never going to become a cars salesman was he!

I get a lot of his beef in parts but mostly it all seems so normal. Other parts of it, show that our Royals are stuck.

What sister in law to be hasn't been offended by the one already incumbent and vice versa? What kid hasn't been totally against a step dad or mum? His story in parts is as old as the hills and we find ourselves comparing our lives to his, here and there, recognising ourselves in the process. Yawn and yet, Kate is our Queen in waiting and I for one want to see her build bridges, not walls.

If you needed my lipgloss, I would hand it to you and not expect it back.

Harry, I'm not sure putting a target on one families back is the best idea you ever had though! Killing, even if a Royal solider at war ain't ever gonna win you brownie points. This dehumanising attitude to war, really isn't modern at all and now, you will definitely have to spend some of that hard earned cash on security to protect them going forward!

** Harry talks in the news about the media taking this all out of context.

There are some other misjudged quotes that really make me shake my head. No one cares if two wealthy folks have to suffer Ikea and or second hand furniture? We all do at some point, but we also can google their personal wealth! I'm pretty sure they really could have afforded to furnish that tiny house just as they wanted. Just silly! It makes me wonder about one thing! Who's advising him? Hopefully not Netflix or James Corden (other great British actors are available and anyway I rather like him)! He's right about one thing, the royal family are in bed with the media and its a toxic paring.

The British media are simply vile and we need to put some laws in place to protect everyone from their games. Also, why journalists/presenters such as the gutter journalist Piers Morgan can get away with, what can only be described as hate speech, I will never know! He really acts like he's personally affected by H&M's life, love and laundry, he's not. He really should go to prison and talk to the walls for a while. If I were a decent journalist, I would want reform. I would want to report real news and not be encouraged to make it up!

The vilification of M is not okay, royal or not. You may decide she's not your cuppa tea and thats okay, move on, nothing to see here.

I'm very surprised at Harry backtracking from the racism row, which the Royal Family do need to learn from. Institutional or unconscious bias? Isn't that just excusing Rich Royals who are well educated, well informed, that it's not their fault they are racist, its simply being Royal and its always been said that way? How can we ever be unconscious about treating colour as a problem?

Oh dear.

Tell it like it is Dear Harry, don't adjust the story to let them off.

We should never gloss over these issues even if told to? Still, privileged or not, he's traumatised and he's human. I mean, who would want to grow up with the title 'The Spare'?. That said, I feel the book is very childish in parts which may make readers skim over the really important stuff and there's plenty we should be taking on board.

Everyone I know has a different take on the H&M royal brand. Even in my own little trusted circle we see it all differently. I for one feel that the Queen has gone now RIP and since her passing, I expect an end to that victorian rule, its way past its sell by date. I want modern royals, not more of the same, but I fear Charles is too old and stuck to change anything and William is too scared/scarred. It doesn't make for a happy family or a happy public, who are starting to wonder about their place in our country. I'm not talking revolution, but I am talking about some very rich, public people who behave very badly and aren't making the changes necessary for a transparent, modern royal family. They aren't doing themselves any favours.

I have something to say to the Royal family and I'm a Royalist.

The age of the stiff upper lip is over. Not saying sorry is not going to cut it with the public anymore. Saying nothing is sometimes saying everything and silence isn't what we want or expect. Silence is lazy and perpetuates abuse. We want to see the end to royal households using their staff and each other to leak to the press about each other. We don't want to hear about very wealthy privileged folks SILENTLY say 'let them eat cake'.

How can they advocate good mental health, when they are unwilling to see the other side of the argument, please sit down and find a way through it? How can we believe them? Why would we even want them around to look up to?

What do we want?

I for one want to see them work together to make our country a better place. I want to see them all reconcile (except Andrew) of course. Sometimes if a worker bee does a job badly or brings the house name into disrepute, off they should jolly well go and no more hands in the family till please!

I want to see the royal family utilise all their individual talents and not get scared of any one of them stealing the lime light once in a while. I do feel they missed a trick with M. She has her part to play on the world stage. She represents a mixed race community that is often overlooked especially in our Royal family. I don't want to hear about jealousy or in fighting. Kate has her role and M could have had hers and never the twain would step on each others royal toes if managed correctly! Who cares if M is divorced! This is 2023 for gods sake! Who cares if she's an actress! She can work the world stage!!

I do of course want to hear when bullying or racism takes place and I want to know what they are doing about it? No one thinks being royal entitles them to gloss over or ignore the issues we are all having to deal with daily.

We want a grown up family now please and thank you. Do your jobs properly. Get a proper HR dept! Manage the firm better! Make sure your staff can get help when needed at every level!

I wasn't terribly offended that Harry and his family decided to quit. Folks are quitting all over the world, quitting mundane jobs and companies where they are just a number! I had hoped that they could carve out a roving role in the common wealth, why not? Alas, it wasn't to be. Maybe if the great British press had not lobbied against them, they could have indeed helped modernise the now sad, sorry institution!

We understand he was born into it, didn't choose it and it was never going to be great being the spare to the Heir. We also accept the trauma associated with his mothers death, of course we do. We get that his life has been a gilded cage in parts and the media have made his life hell. We understand how disappointed he is in his father and now his brother. We get it all. He has his eyes open now and wants to do good and right by the world. He can. Please let the book be an end to the recriminations. Use your title Harry the way the public want you to, for the good of all.

I get that Harry didn't see much of the unfairness until Meghan showed him it, we all take our sweet time growing up but what now?

It's time to move forward and start healing and I don't think he will or can, until his family understand they have a part to play in his healing. He may end up drinking from a half full cup for the rest of his life, but he's said his piece they both have. All they can do is move forward and build an altruistic empire and show them how its supposed to be done!

I do think the Royal family have a part to play in the future of our country. I do. I love the pomp and ceremony our country can offer to foreign visitors. However, I'd say that without meaningful, visible positive change, they are in danger of becoming obsolete and thats a dangerous position to be in.

The thing is, they needed Harry and his beautiful worldly wife. William really needs him to share the load, Kate too. Far from being a spare, there was plenty to do between the 4 of them, Harry did have a job, a place beside, not behind his brother. It's really quite sad that its come to this. I hope they all leave the door open. Reconciliation is never easy, but sometimes it simply has to happen. In this case I feel the brothers have a lot to loose going forward, by not having that special relationship they relied on in the past.

Thats my say on the Desperate Royal saga, now back to the TV.

D x