Light at the end of the tunnel?
I'm absolutely bloody chuffed, as it was always a risk throwing in the towel that was 'Simply' and starting from scratch, again! I've gone back to what The Very UnFrench Wife was originally and whilst it took a few months for me to settle in, be myself again, it appears to have been the right move in the end. I feel liberated from others either trying to manage or dull me down. I employed all my gumption, but I think it has helped that I don't worry too much about popularity, for me it's always been more about sharing my journey and having a good old chat.
It's utterly glorious just being who I always was, without all the drama that kept on coming. Phew!
The only bump in the road I foresee is the 'what if?'......what if we don't make France our permanent home in the next 18 months? I'd certainly have to change the name of the blog and I'm so comfortable being her, The Very Unfrench Wife. She's like an old pair of tatty but super comfy slippers! I love her, the sassy pants that she is, my nemesis, my pen, my voice.
Oh, I know there were many that thought, still think, I'm a mad cow and I was, for helping people that absolutely wanted me to fail. The thing is, I've never ever been frightened to start again, over and over again as long as I need or want to. It's a fresh page, clean slate and of course a release from everything that was bothering me. I have moved home and country more than is good for any human, but I developed a resilience that serves me well in times of change. I only wish I'd had the balls to do it earlier really, however, I take my responsibilities seriously and that's the flaw that kept me trying to fix it, when really there was no point.
I'm trying to teach my youngest daughter, to scratch negativity completely out of her life in all forms and promptly. I'm so hoping she learns early to be herself and be proud of it with no apologies. It took me 54 years! Being nice and kind is all very well, but one really has to be super choosy where one sprinkles that magic!
We live our lives in parts and not every part needs to mirror the last, nor do you have to feel the same about something you once loved. I'm very much a work in progress and with the gift of hind sight (would the be nice) I can accept my mistakes and move forward without them clogging up the way ahead.
Anywhoo, it's all go here in terms of getting ready to move. We are awaiting the GO for another house and so there's a 80/20 chance we could end up homeless. Best laid plans and all that! Wish us luck!
When the French rental turned out to be a foolish folly, we were put in a position of it being too late to cancel moving out of here, sadly. It would definitely been easier to stay put. So many plans have had to be changed and today brings another curve ball. His registration document is missing for the lorry! It was all there when for the Ukraine charity trip! Arghhhhhh! Tomorrow is his CT (MOT) day. You really couldn't make it up! Honestly, it does appear to be another French life/admin nightmare in the making! I say this all the time but thanks Brexshit voters, you know not what you did....I hope?
Essentially, we are living a very complicated life, getting older every day and I do wonder often if it's worth it? Don't answer that!
P.S. I have really gone off Instagram......did I tell you this already?