Sometimes in life the gifts we receive are the gifts

...we didn't even know we needed, don't yah think?

It's been a tumultuous year and most of the turmoil was certainly unexpected. We got through it all one way or another and here we are, its almost mid December, 2022 is nearly in the bag!

Sigh.

I haven't blogged in a few weeks, because I am assimilating it all. Healing, if you like. Also, I really didn't want to bore you all to death with the never-ending unpacking thing, family angst and the seasonal ailments to go with.

Yawn.

I had high hopes for a big family Christmas this year, it's not going to happen. People change don't they? We drift. We were always different, always close, but sometimes those differences are too big to make it happen again.

COVID took him from me but he didn't die, thankfully. I'm just dead to him. It's very sad. We all make our own choices in life and my choices are to vaccinate when required. My happy choice. End of story. We have to keep looking for the joy in life and moving forward positively. We have to keep living. I love and miss my brother, always will. My door will always remain open to him.

A quiet Christmas is honestly okay, we need downtime as we get older I feel. I like to be busy, but I also like to do absolutely sweet nothing in-between. I'm not lamenting the failed rental in France as it brought us to this point, here and even though we are without heating for the second time, we love it here.

This house is surrounded by untamed nature. Every window is a frame for whatever is going outside. It's just lovely. We even have a very strange but friendly pheasant on the grounds, he just stands and stares at us. I feel his confusion. We are in his world, not him in ours. He's so cute, we've decided he's part of the family now and have named him Derek! Arise Sir Derek, sadly there are too many bunnies and squirrels to name and they probably don't care! Also, I think we have a critter in the floorboards somewhere, gotta love old houses, they are so full of surprises and not always good ones.

Life goes on and we are 89% loaded here. There are a couple of rooms we haven't paid much attention to, because we are old and over it all! No seriously, we only bit off what we could chew and accordingly the dining room is enough ready for a visit from Santa! We've just dragged the beast of a Christmas tree in ready for decoration tomorrow. A bit more faffing and a birthday breakfast and we will be waiting! I love decorating and I predict their will be mulled wine and silliness......oh no there won't as we are playing taxi again! No matter.

Without heating, this big old house is a bit of an ice box, but I'm still thankful for the potential of a warm house down the line, as there are so many folks going without this year. Being warm is now a luxury in our strange, mixed up world, its pretty awful isn't it?

My Dad is recovering well and has just been over to help faff with bits. Sadly, my father in laws treatment has finished and he's now in the twilight months. Life isn't often fair is it? It's a sharp reminder to us all, to live our lives, really live, love hard, forgive and go make some of those dreams happen before the egg timer called life runs out.

B has her hearing on the 16th. We have high hopes, but I don't think they are the same as hers sadly. I guess we will deal with whatever the fall out is, the way we always do. Oddly, whilst she's in prison in a mental health wing, she's safe and medicated and returning to a shadow of herself. It's very painful as once she's back in the community care, the same team that keeps failing her, it all begins again.

Anyway, I'm very much looking forward to the next few weeks. It will be nice to kick back, not have too much time in the kitchen. I fully intend to watch too many cheesy movies, drink and eat my weight, twice and play the family games with all my usual enthusiasm, maybe cheat a little, who knows?

Have a wonderful festive season. Reach out to those you love and miss, doesn't matter if it doesn't come back to you. Get out and walk in that fresh spiky winter air, but most of all, be thankful for what you do have.

Merry Christmas UnFrenchies, here's to peace on earth and goodwill to all.

Gumption as always.

D x